GHOULIES

My favourite bit of trivia about Ghoulies is that it was in production at the same time as Gremlins but because the producer of this movie, Charles Band, ran out of money, Gremlins was able to be released first. And you know that info came straight from Band, who you know must have told that story to every person he ever met. 
 
The reason I love that fact so much is the unspoken suggestion that if Ghoulies had been the first to arrive it would be the big hit, and that the reason Gremlins was a big hit wasn’t because it was a masterful work of horror comedy but because it happened to be about small things. If Ghoulies had arrived in theatres first I have no doubt that it would have also failed because it is a terrible film.

Ghoulies isn’t alone in being a Gremlin knock-off or wannabe, there are so many. Your Critters, your Troll, your Munchies. They all have their own brand of gross little puppets. Of all of them Ghoulies certainly has the best poster. The little green Ghoulie is COMING OUT OF THE TOILET. The best part about the poster is that the scene of the Ghoulie popping his head out of the toilet wasn’t originally in the film. It was thought up by the marketing team to be used in the advertising campaign, and it tested so well that they went back and shot an extra scene to add this toilet creep in.
 
And that tells you everything you need to know about this mess of a movie. It has an impossible to follow plot about satanic cults and little ghoulies and ghosts and a pair of magical dwarves named Grizzel and Greedigut. It’s the sort of movie where they should have handed the whole film over to the geniuses up in marketing thinking up the idea of shoving bald little green men in toilets for laffs.

Where would I fit into Ghoulies? Why don’t I ask you that exact same question. If you were in Ghoulies, where would you want to be? In a basement filled with all sorts of cult business? Or would you, a sane person who gets it, know deep down that you have only one option when it comes to existing in the Ghoulies universe? Exactly. Get me in a room with that toilet Ghoulie.

IF I WERE IN ‘GHOULIES’ I WOULD: SOON AFTER THE PARTY GET THE NICKNAME ‘SINKSHIT’